It's All in My Head

Scheduled: 5 Actual: 4 RPE: 6-7

I'm not sure if I could have woken up in worse mood if I tried!

I had a pretty relaxing and productive night yesterday but also pretty lonesome. I feel like I am in so many places at once: trying to pack and leave Japan but also trying to apply for jobs and get ready for my life back home as well as trying to forget the part where Stephen will be in England and I will be in the States.

I haven't been sleeping enough all week and my dinner last night was popcorn and soda so as far as physical preparation goes I more or less stabbed myself in the back. I thought about skipping my morning run and doing it after school but I knew it would be too hot and I don't want to skip a run.

I laced up my shoes and tried to finish a mile. I barely made it. On a day like today no amount of mental focus was going to get me out of this rut. So I went back into my house and got my iPod. I mouthed along to the words and tried to forget how much I didn't want to be doing this and how stiff I was. Non-Runner's Trainer recommends not using a music player during the runs so you can focus on the mental techniques and pay attention to how your body feels. It makes sense to me. But not today. I needed to run so I needed to tune myself out.

I'm not sure if the mind is this powerful but I almost think my sore muscles were more mental than physical. I hadn't felt any soreness or stiffness until I started running. It may have been all in my mind.

A friend of my mom's is an amazingly dedicated runner. She's emailed me some tips. Just today I got the perfect email from her: Don't worry about the miles as much as working on your mental fortitude. Remember you can walk 1 minute for each mile you do. Take time to catch your breath, and rest. Take your time, remember the run is about a lot more than just the mileage, it is about your ability to withstand difficult situations and make it through. Perfect timing for those words, I think! Sometimes I give myself a hard time and have a little too high expectations. This isn't going to be a breeze. I'm going to have days like today. But showing up, that's important. Showing up and running.

I am a marathoner!

Let's Running.

A Birthday Run

Scheduled: 10 Actual: 7 RPE: 7-8

I'm 24 today! I welcomed the day at 5:00 to run my ten miles (perhaps an unrealistic goal given that last week I only ran 5 miles on my long run).

I passed my neighbor, Ms. Meddler and she said "mo chotto na" which means "a little more/a little longer/a bit more again" but given that we hadn't been talking about anything it really meant: "I'm trying to trap you into chatting with me again." But it's my birthday and I wanted to try my hardest to run as many miles as I could so I smiled, gave a little nod, and said "na" which is a really lazy way of saying "That's right" and went on my way.

It felt WONDERFUL!

I decided to walk the first mile since it helped warm me up so well on my run Wednesday. I hardly had cramps during my second mile and no leg cramps in any of the following miles. I think an alternative could also be a really slow jog to warm me up.

It was terribly hot and humid and I was sweating through all my clothes. I have never sweat that much in my life! I stopped after each mile and drank a little sports drink. And I kept running.

In my previous long runs I've had a side cramp and I assumed it was from too much water so I cut back. After reading the chapter on hydration I decided that was a dumb plan. I got the cramp again this run but as I drank more it went away.

I've decided to cut back my day 4 schedule. I'm too far behind and the leap from what I have done to what I am scheduled to do psyches me out too much. Also, this humidity is killer and I need to take that into account. I'm going to increase my long run by a mile every week and then when I get home I'll up it by 2 or 3 miles every week and get back on track to where I'm running the longest runs (18 miles) with the program.

This week the chapter was on visualization as a mental technique. For me, this will take quite a lot of practice. I am a words person predominately. We are asked at this stage to create two mental "video tapes" of our best training run and of what it will feel like to cross the finish line on marathon day. I meant to create the first tape for myself before my long run but I simply ran out of time. I decided to start with words that described my first 7-mile run and work on mental images at a later stage.

"The cool breeze refreshing me, making every step lighter, every step smoother." I've realized through this training how much my tendency to over-analyze things can get in the way of giving an honest go of something. My first year of college I took a class that gave an overview of Eastern religions. A Buddhist mantra that I still remember today is, "No thought, no mind." It's purpose is to emphasize the importance of experience, of living in the present and absorbing life. In order to make sure my visualization mantra above wasn't interrupted by unrelated thoughts I repeated, "no thought, no mind" in my head at the same time, forcing my mind to focus simply on running.

Heading out today I knew I wouldn't make all ten miles because of the time but I wanted to make sure I gave it an honest effort. I messaged both Stephen and Jordan about my run in order to motivate me to run as much as I could so that I could proudly report back to them later. In previous long runs I've walked several miles but barely run the rest. I decided I would run some of every mile. It was a bit too hot to expect myself not to walk at all but I wanted to know that I ran as much as I could until I had to stop. I felt amazing after the run!

I'm looking forward to next week when I increase the short and long runs.

Let's Running.

Total this Week: 17 miles Cumulative Total: 57 miles

Reality Check

Scheduled: 4 Actual: 4 RPE: 4

The first mile is really a struggle for me. My body is still waking up and my mind is foggy. It probably doesn't help that half the time--or more!--I wake up to my alarm and mutter groggily to myself, "I really don't wanna do this." I'll keep working on that positive attitude. My body felt rusty; as I warmed up in that first mile I swear I heard myself creaking like the Tinman in Wizard of Oz. It was about a 17 minute mile.

Mile 2 and 3 were my best miles and I finished them in 12 minutes each. I walked about 3/4 of my last mile because of my leg cramps and finished in about 15 minutes. I think my mantra was off. Instead of just saying, "I am getting stronger" I said, "My calves are getting stronger." I think that was a mistake because it reminded me too much that my calves were cramping.

Now is time for a reality check. I have been really worried about how long my miles take. I know it's early in my training and maybe I'll get faster as I progress but I haven't had any improvement yet. I decided to calculate and see just how much trouble I was going to be in unless I didn't pick up the pace. Turns out, absolutely none! If I run an average of 12 minute miles over the course of 26.2 miles I will finish in about 5 hours, not 6 like I'm expecting. So I officially need to give myself a break and just enjoy my training.

Let's Running.

Day One of New Schedule=SUCCESS!

Scheduled: 3 miles Actual: 3 miles RPE: 5

First an update on my diet: I decided to cut out pop and french fries. I'd like to cut out all deep-fried foods but I know that if I set that rule I'd just want to break it because it seems too difficult. But by saying I won't eat fries I hope to make myself think twice before eating other deep-fried foods. I made breakfast for dinner Friday night but instead of hash browns I ate rice with my scrambled eggs and an English muffin with blueberry jam on the side. So far, so good.

It's still very humid and I started today's run pretty discouraged since I realized it'll be another three or four weeks before this humidity clears up a little. I ran and walked my first mile in 17 minutes. That's a new record for me...and not the good kind. My calf and shin muscles have been really cramped the last few runs and I think I've let that discourage me as well. I stretched half-way through my 17-minute mile but it didn't help too much. As I was getting to my house (the one-mile marker) I decided that instead of stopping like I normally do and having to will myself to start again I would just run through onto my second mile.

My legs were still cramped. My whole run I felt like I was on one of those tracks at airports that are like escalators just flat. Only that I was going the wrong way!

But I decided I was going to finish this run, run all the miles, and start week three off right. So I kept my eyes on the ground a few feet in front of me and repeated, "My legs are really sore but that's OK because that means I'm getting stronger." Eventually I shortened it to, "I'm getting stronger" and timed it with my breathing: IN IN-OUT OUT-IN IN. "I am/ get-ting/stron-ger."

And that's how I ran two solid miles without stopping. My leg cramps worked themselves out with about a half-mile to go but that's OK because I finished my run regardless.

Let's Running.