Downpours and Thunder and Lightning, Oh My!

Scheduled: 4 Actual: 1 RPE: 3

Though I only ran a mile, today was one of my best training runs ever. It was POURING rain. Not even my crazy, meddling neighbor was out strolling and rain usually doesn't stop her. I had plans to call Jordan after my run because it's been ages since our schedules worked out to chat and part of me thought, "Meh, why not skip the run altogether. You don't have time to finish it anyway." And as soon as I thought that I immediately said, "No way!" I'm no longer running just because I have to run to complete my marathon in September. I'm running because I like it! I like starting my day off running.

For half of my route I ran next to rice paddies and the sound of rain hitting the shallow water that the rice plants sit in is a very pretty and peaceful sound. I'm glad I got to hear that. Also, since it was pouring it wasn't humid and the run was almost pleasant (minus my soggy, spongy shoes). But thunder and lightning started during my first mile and so I decided to call it a day.

This week in Non-Runner's Trainer they emphasize the importance of self-talk and how what we say about ourselves becomes our perception about ourselves. Though this is my first experience with endurance sports, I am very familiar with the power of positive self-talk.

When I was 15-years-old my older brother died by suicide. About a year later I was taking anti-depressants and in counseling. Since then I have seen more than six different therapists, the most recent being about five years ago (I also stopped taking the medication at about this time). In a session in those dark first months the therapist asked me to compile a list of things I liked about myself. She had to help me with every single one and when I looked back on the list I realized they were all things concerning other people ("I'm kind" "I like to volunteer") and none just about me ("I'm beautiful" "I'm smart").

Whenever I 'd look in a mirror I always thought and said horrible things about myself. My negativity about my appearance had started to erode what I thought about my personality. So, I started arguments with myself. My first thought would be, "You are so ugly" but as soon as I said that I'd counter it and say, "No! You are very beautiful, Claire." It wasn't too long before I only said the positive thing and even to this day I smile at myself in mirrors, almost involuntarily.

This week's reading reminded me of this process. Much like how recovered drug-addicts are still technically addicts, I am someone who has recovered from depression, not someone cured of any traces of what once was a lifestyle. I need to always remind myself how wonderful I am, how I can run these training miles, and how I will run that marathon. It's not just a good idea, it's vital to my success. And I intend to succeed.

So, Let's Running!

A Birthday Run

Scheduled: 10 Actual: 7 RPE: 7-8

I'm 24 today! I welcomed the day at 5:00 to run my ten miles (perhaps an unrealistic goal given that last week I only ran 5 miles on my long run).

I passed my neighbor, Ms. Meddler and she said "mo chotto na" which means "a little more/a little longer/a bit more again" but given that we hadn't been talking about anything it really meant: "I'm trying to trap you into chatting with me again." But it's my birthday and I wanted to try my hardest to run as many miles as I could so I smiled, gave a little nod, and said "na" which is a really lazy way of saying "That's right" and went on my way.

It felt WONDERFUL!

I decided to walk the first mile since it helped warm me up so well on my run Wednesday. I hardly had cramps during my second mile and no leg cramps in any of the following miles. I think an alternative could also be a really slow jog to warm me up.

It was terribly hot and humid and I was sweating through all my clothes. I have never sweat that much in my life! I stopped after each mile and drank a little sports drink. And I kept running.

In my previous long runs I've had a side cramp and I assumed it was from too much water so I cut back. After reading the chapter on hydration I decided that was a dumb plan. I got the cramp again this run but as I drank more it went away.

I've decided to cut back my day 4 schedule. I'm too far behind and the leap from what I have done to what I am scheduled to do psyches me out too much. Also, this humidity is killer and I need to take that into account. I'm going to increase my long run by a mile every week and then when I get home I'll up it by 2 or 3 miles every week and get back on track to where I'm running the longest runs (18 miles) with the program.

This week the chapter was on visualization as a mental technique. For me, this will take quite a lot of practice. I am a words person predominately. We are asked at this stage to create two mental "video tapes" of our best training run and of what it will feel like to cross the finish line on marathon day. I meant to create the first tape for myself before my long run but I simply ran out of time. I decided to start with words that described my first 7-mile run and work on mental images at a later stage.

"The cool breeze refreshing me, making every step lighter, every step smoother." I've realized through this training how much my tendency to over-analyze things can get in the way of giving an honest go of something. My first year of college I took a class that gave an overview of Eastern religions. A Buddhist mantra that I still remember today is, "No thought, no mind." It's purpose is to emphasize the importance of experience, of living in the present and absorbing life. In order to make sure my visualization mantra above wasn't interrupted by unrelated thoughts I repeated, "no thought, no mind" in my head at the same time, forcing my mind to focus simply on running.

Heading out today I knew I wouldn't make all ten miles because of the time but I wanted to make sure I gave it an honest effort. I messaged both Stephen and Jordan about my run in order to motivate me to run as much as I could so that I could proudly report back to them later. In previous long runs I've walked several miles but barely run the rest. I decided I would run some of every mile. It was a bit too hot to expect myself not to walk at all but I wanted to know that I ran as much as I could until I had to stop. I felt amazing after the run!

I'm looking forward to next week when I increase the short and long runs.

Let's Running.

Total this Week: 17 miles Cumulative Total: 57 miles

A Blessing Spoken Too Early in the Morning

Scheduled: 8 Actual: 5 RPE: 6

This is the end of week four, 1/4 of the way through my 16-week training program. Wow. Time is a funny thing. Hours drag as I'm sweltering in this heat with no A/C at work and yet weeks just fly by.

I wanted to run 8 miles today.But at 92% humidity and 80 degrees out frankly I am happy with how far I made it. I walked the last two miles and completed the 5-mile outing in about an hour.

I had a really weird start to the run. I will preface it with this verse from Proverbs 27:14 "A loud and cheerful greeting early in the morning will be taken as a curse!"

At 5:15am I was later than I should have been but still thought I might be able to finish the run. I saw an old lady trying to make eye-contact with me and also checking her watch. As I got closer I realized I'd run into her before and it was unpleasant so I kept my eyes glued to the ground and barely replied as she said good morning to me. That was enough encouragement for her and 30 minutes and a bewildering conversation later I was finally starting my run.

The first time I had a run in with this woman was as I was trying to hurry along to work. She stopped at my house as I was packing up my bike and commented that my tree needed cutting. I was in no mood to be reprimanded by a stranger who apparently had nothing else better to do than make her neighbors late for work.

I do cut my tree, but I can't reach up to the power lines, obviously, and so there are some very long branches up there. I replied with the Japanese equivalent of, "Yeah, but it's not like I can do it!" I don't normally start conversations off rudely, especially in a language I have a minimal command of. But for the love! Monday mornings are not the time to be told you're not doing a good job. She, however, was undeterred and continued chatting with me as I mumbled responses and slowly peddled my bike and checked my watch. She got the hint and I made it to work just in time for the morning meeting, sweating profusely.

This time she asked me if I knew what Tanabata is. It's the Star Festival. You tie wishes to a bamboo shoot and the next day, July 8th, you burn the whole thing sending your wishes to the other world. I have been living in Japan for two years; I know the major holidays.

She then took me to her house to see her bamboo shoot. I took a photo of it on my phone after she leadingly noted that I had my phone with me. And then she said, "Tanabata isn't a holiday in other countries, is it?" Like many people throughout the world, this woman has a misunderstanding of what unique means in a global context. As Stephen has frequently remarked when we run into comments like this, "Yes, Japan is a unique country. In world of unique countries." No, we don't celebrate Tanabata, with it's bamboo wish shoot. Much like you don't celebrate Easter, with it's egg hunts and chaotic iconography, Ms. Meddler.

Was she trying to be friendly, if simultaneously patronizing? Of course, sweet thing. But even a cheerful greeting spoken too early in the morning will be taken as a curse. I just wanted to run.

Let's Running.


Week Total: 12 Cumulative Total: 40